.
Enough discouragement can silence anyone.
Intricately folded, twisted, or coiled.
It’s so convoluted I don’t know what to fucking believe in anymore.
Listening the last time
This is why I loved the support groups so much. If people thought you were dying, they gave you their full attention. If this might be the last time they saw you, they really saw you. People listened instead of just waiting for their turn to speak. And when they spoke, they weren’t telling you a story. When the two of you talked, you were building something, and afterward you were both different than before.
Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club
Semi Soliloquoy
So I feel at this moment in time that I do not deserve a lot of people in my life right now.
Is it too late to be grateful?
I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. Stay strong.
Maybe
Maybe what doesn’t kill you… kills you later.
Mother, knows best
“People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered:
Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives:
Be kind anyway.
If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies:
Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank people will try to cheat you:
Be honest anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight:
Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous of you:
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, will often be forgotten by tomorrow:
Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough:
Give your best anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God.
It was never between you and them anyway.”
The Great Escape
Also known as The Point of No Return, The Usual Divergent Path and Destiny falls into your Lap? Take it.
I do not have to deal with the cards that I’ve been dealt.
Reasons for Escape
1) To trade the temperature of the shadows here for that of the East Coast’s. I deal with color everyday and can safely say that it makes a huge difference. Some people will choose to focus on the fact that there will be shadows wherever you go, but I choose to focus on the value, shade, tone and depth.
If I do not belong here, I will belong somewhere else.
2) Learn to draw all over again. I want to draw everything on everything.
3) Make my films. I have three stories to tell.
4) Work at Nickelodeon.
5) I have run out of excuses.
Shoelaces
I am connected to the very first man who ever tied his shoelaces together, to prevent his shoes from tumbling off his feet. In that same vein, I am connected to you.
You, who also know how to tie your own laces.
We are not born with the knowledge of tying our shoelaces together. We must acquire this skill from someone before us, and he before him from he before him before him before him and before, must have gained the gift of lacing from his father and his father from his father’s father’s father’s father and all the fathers from the definite number of fathers before him, from the very first son, who learnt from the one and only Grand Father of Shoelace Tying. He was a genius.
That is how I am related to you, a complete stranger. But by having relations it would mean that we are no longer strangers to each other. Just as shoelaces hold our shoes together, the very notion of the motion of tying holds us, the whole world together.
The only strangers left, or the strange estranged would have to be people who wear Crocs. These people do not know how to tie their shoelaces, because they do not have any.
Back from/to reality
Just back from Thailand.
I miss it. I miss having no responsibilities.
3 Things I am Grateful For
1) Daya. He promises to never walk away from me. It is a big promise.
2) Drinking water
3) Being forgiven. I must learn to forgive in return.
